Thursday 19 January 2012

Music can bring up so many emotions...

That it makes me feel alive.

When I grew up, it was expected that me and my sister would learn a musical intrument. We were never pushed into it, it was just a natural progression into the people we would become. 

There is almost something magical about hearing some music, or those perfect lyrics that will spark and light something inside you. 

Suddenly, I can't imagine why I would ever want to leave this world.

I'll be ok for as long as I have music.

Thursday 12 January 2012

Journey of self discovery...

Almost two years ago now, I came out of my first long term relationship. By the end of it, I felt drained physically and emotionally from putting in so much effort. When I came out the other side, I had this new found freedom, and went through a little bit of a rebellious streak. And when that was over, I thought: That's it now, that's enough. I just needed time to my self.
I know it sounds a little cliche, but this was something that I have needed, and benefited from. When I came out of the relationship, I had been diagnosed with Crohn's disease almost two years. I hadn't given myself that much time to understand, to properly come to terms with everything that had happened to me. Its fair enough, I was just trying to get on with my life.
But with all this time to myself, I have learnt so much.

This is what I have learnt:

1. Life is tough. It throws things your way that you would never expect.
2. Time keeps going. Even if you want your world to stop, you have to keep going.
3. People care. People will help you if you ask them, you don't have to struggle alone.
4. I'm stronger than I thought. The more I get through, I enable myself to keep going.
And finally,
Working towards a degree is hard work for anyone. Sometimes I just feel so tired I don't want to face anything. But I know what I am fighting for and I know what I want. If I let this beat me it will be the worst feeling of defeat.
So: 5. I can keep fighting and achieve anything I want. Because I have accepted there will be hurdles along the way.

And I won't let it beat me.

Sunday 1 January 2012

Happy New Year!

To be honest, I liked 2011, and I'm not sure if 2012 will match up!
I can't say there was anything particularly special or bad about 2011, but that's what I like about it. It started off unwell and ended up healthy-er! It has generally been a happy year. Surrounded by the best of friends and good memories. My summer was a lot of fun, my first festival and my first aeroplane!
I hope 2012 will be happy. But it is the year I have to grow up and be an adult, I will graduate and no longer be a student. I will finally have to find myself a proper job!
I have a couple of wishes for 2012. And for once, I want more than anything for them to come true!
For anyone reading this - firstly, thank you for reading my blog! I hope you enjoy it and see that I am a positive and mostly happy person despite any negative feelings shown in this blog.

And finally - happy new year! :) I wish 2012 to be happy, successful, but most importantly healthy!